How About a Few Chicago Bear Jokes!

Time to take time for a little fun!  Chicago Bear Jokes!!!

Want to hear a Bears joke?
Jay Cutler

What is the difference between a Bears fan and a baby?
A baby will stop whining after awhile.

What’s the difference between Soldier Field and a porcupine?
The pricks are on the outside of a porcupine.

How many Chicago Bears does it take to change a tire?
One, unless it’s a blowout, in which case they all show up

How do you stop an Chicago Bears fan from beating his wife?
Dress her in Green and Gold

Why do Chicago Bears fans keep their season tickets on their dashboards?
So they can park in handicap spaces

Why doesn’t Springfield have a professional football team?
Because then Chicago would want one

What do you call 53 rich guys sitting around watching the Super Bowl?
The Chicago Bears

What did Jay Cutler get on his Wonderlic test?
Drool

Why do the trees in Wisconsin lean to the south?
Because the Vikings blow and the Bears suck.

What’s the best thing to come out of Chicago?
I-94

On the first day of school the teacher explained to her class that she’s a Chicago Bears fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they’re Bears fans. Everyone in the class raises their hand except one girl. The teacher looks at the girl with surprise, “Janie, why didn’t you raise your hand?”

“Because I’m not a Bears fan,” she replied. The teacher, still shocked, asked, “Well, if you aren’t a Bears fan, then who are you a fan of?”

“I am a Packers fan,” the girl replied. The teacher could not believe her ears. “Janie please tell us why you’re a Packers fan?”

“Because my mom is a Packers fan, and my dad is Packers fan, so I’m a Packers fan too!”

“Well,” said the teacher in a obviously annoyed tone, “that’s no reason for you to be a Packers fan. You don’t have to be just like your parents all of the time. What if your mom was an idiot and your dad was a moron, what would you be then?”

“I’d be a Bears fan,” she said.

———

A Chicago Bears football fan was almost killed in a tragic horse accident. He fell from the horse and was nearly trampled to death.

Thank God the manager of the K-Mart came out and unplugged it.

Nother like the Green Bay & Chicago Bear Rivalry!!